Here is the loooooooong update
On Doug
Most days Doug is loving school. He comes home pumped about all the cool stuff he is learning and he works very very hard to make time for the family and get all the school work done and still have time to keep up with other media to help him in his program. Basically he is crazy busy but somehow is doing a really great job of juggling it all.
On the Provo house
Looks like the house will most likely close by the end of the month. The mortgage company approved the short sale and we are waiting for the final word from the city. I'm sad but also relieved and also a bit detached from the whole thing now that we are in the swing of things here. Though this is my favorite time of year in Provo and people post pictures of the canyons and a part of me just wants to cry and slowly stroke the computer screen... but I disgress. The house sitch is shaping up and we couldn't be more grateful.
On Austin
Cooler weather has arrived (at least for a little while) and it has been SO NICE! We've been able to keep the windows open at night and we have been outside EVERY DAY for like a week now. Holy crap is it nice to be about to not be stuck in the house. This has really really improved our mood (the collective House of Crabb mood that is). We also found a rockin' awesome park very close to our house (not close enough to walk but only like a 5 - 10 min drive). It has equipment and a water splash up pad thing and tons of stuff for kids. It also has a LAKE and a beautiful path and deer and bunnies and stray cats that I will eventually domesticate enough to take home with me (don't kill my dreams - just keep nodding your head) and the park is practically deserted most of the time. It has been an amazing find.
On the job front
I have had two interviews this past week that both went very very well. I would be grateful to work for either company. The two companies are very different and the jobs themselves are slightly different but both would entail doing training, which just makes me so excited! I'm going to describe both a bit in detail so feel free to skip this boring part -
Job 1 - I'd be a trainer/consultant for a small software company that has created a product solely for the vast and confusing world of higher ed accreditation. They require you have an advanced degree (which makes me feel like maybe grad school was worth it afterall) and they pay well. Its VERY close to our house here (AWESOME!) and I think I would absolutely love what I'd be doing and would also really get the chance to push myself and move up since its such a small company. I wouldn't be doing quite as much training as the other job but the consulting portion of the job sounds equally as appealing to me, so I'm not bummed about the training part only being about 60% of the job.
Job 2 - I'd be a contract trainer working part time for a subsidiary of the State of Texas who does all their employee training. I'd train all sorts of things from tech topics to professional development topics. They are not flexible on the hours (classroom trainings are pretty standard 8 -5 with the trainer coming early and leaving late) but I get to choose what days I would work so hopefully I could try and make it work around Doug's schedule. Its also pretty close, pays reasonable and the company is really really great. I'd really get a TON of training experience under my belt and I think I could add some real value in other areas of the company and could even make it a full time role if it made sense/cents.
For Job 1 I have a second interview next week where I am doing a 30 min training to show my stuff. I plan to just blow it out of the water. I'm so excited to knock their socks off. I'm definitely more interested in Job 1 but I think either would just be an amazing blessing for our family. We are really getting down to the wire in the financials and could really use some employment.
On Working v Staying Home
I suppose I really came to terms with staying home a few weeks ago in the depths of my despair about it all. I felt like I really came to a point where I felt like if this was what God was asking me to do then I would learn to be happy doing it. I can very easily see the joy in staying home with the boys. On days where they were in a good mood and I had stuff to do and I could meet up with people or speak to adults at any time in the day (more than, "No I don't need the receipt. Thanks.") I had some really fabulous days. I feel like queen of my domain and was so pleased with myself for things like successful trips to Sam's Club. I think I'm happier working outside the home but I also think I could be happy not doing so as well. I take great comfort though in knowing that I'm just doing exactly what I feel God is telling me to do. Right now that looks like I will working which also means that we will have to figure out some childcare options. I feel really torn about that and I worry about time away from my little guys, but I also know that if I'm supposed to work then the Lord will also show me exactly what I should do with my boys. I have a lot more respect for stay-at-home moms and I think both routes can be both very difficult and very rewarding.
On Church
We still don't have really any friends but I do feel a lot of love from/for people at church. We have all the young 19 year-old missionaries over for dinner 2x a month and they are just so cute and earnest and...hungry. The church is responsible for feeding them but because our ward is of the generally poor kind, not a lot of people sign up to feed the poor kids. So we feed them pancakes or pasta or whatever. Its been a lot of fun to have them over.
I was asked to be the music leader for the children. I've been asked to be this before and have turned it down, but this time I felt the distinct impression that this is what I should do right now. I'm actually really excited! I keep thinking of all the wonderful VBS (vacation bible school) songs I learned as a child and all the wonderful traditional Christian/Baptist kids songs I learned that none of these Mormon kids will know. On the other hand, not having grown up LDS, I have no idea what any of these songs are that they sing. So I guess it will be a learning time for everyone. I'm only with the children for about 30 min so its just enough to have fun and not be stuck with a bunch of kids for hours on end at church. This will be one of the first ones I teach:
Zacchaeus was a wee little man
And a wee little man was he
He climbed up in a sycamore tree
For the Lord he wanted to see
And as the Savior passed that way
He looked up in that tree
And He said, “Zacchaeus, you come down!
For I’m going to your house today
For I’m going to your house to stay”
And a wee little man was he
He climbed up in a sycamore tree
For the Lord he wanted to see
And as the Savior passed that way
He looked up in that tree
And He said, “Zacchaeus, you come down!
For I’m going to your house today
For I’m going to your house to stay”
On the Boys
Sigh. I feel so in love. Seriously. I feel like a lovesick puppy for these guys. They are so wonderful. They are just smiley and laugh all the time. They love each other and they love me and Doug and they just bring so much joy to us and everyone around them. I mean, have you seen this video?
And lest I paint a fake picture, they do drive me crazy. Whitman is OBSESSED, obsessed I tell you, with eating dust bunnies. Seriously. You may laugh but this kid will literally pull fibers off of the rug or carpet until he gets enough to make a wad and then will shove the whole thing in his mouth. I am constantly pulling the nastiest crap out of his mouth. And Charlie. That kid. He is just into everything. And he is really really clingy right now. Like if I walk anywhere he needs to be right at my feet. And if I stand for more than two seconds in one spot then he will pull up on the back of my legs so I can't walk anywhere for fear that he will loose his precarious balance and fall. And they are teething again and have days where they are just SO whiny. But the nice thing about those days is that they sleep a whole lot more when they are teething so its slightly more tolerable.
But all that aside, they are just wonderful. They love to crawl up on to me or Doug and just lay their face on your face like this (sorry for the poor quality)
They love to go out on errands and they always behave whenever we go out...and the people always shout... I'll stop but seriously, they are well behaved. Its great. They both now crawl very well and love to chase Patches the cat. Charlie can pull himself up onto anything and can sorta walk a little bit when holding onto things. Whit is starting to pull himself up on stuff and is a very good walker when we hold his hands. They both have the little pincher hand move goin' on when they grab Puffs (dissolvable cereal snack thing). Whit loves water and will drink the entire sippy cups worth of water if I let him. Charlie, on the other hand, is not much interested in water. They love baths and they enjoy splashing each other and watching the water go down the drain. We showed them a laser pointer the other day and they chased the laser dot around everywhere. It was very funny and also I felt a little bad somehow, like I was making fun of their baby brains or something. Nonetheless, it was funny.
Here are a few more poor quality phone photos...
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| Charlie - left, Whit - right, more interested in chest than toys. Whit probably found a dust bunny... |
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| Whit - left, Charlie - right, Charlie has his hand on Whit's leg. So sweet. |
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| Charlie - left, Whit - right |
I feel hopeful right now. I feel happy. I have yet to figure out how to train for the marathon in February and make amazing homemade meals each night and keep the house clean (though I have far less dust bunnies these days...!) and possibly be employed/search for employment and do church and make friends and feed my marriage and keep connected with loved ones and all the other things that are important to me. I don't know how to balance it all. I've obviously let blogging slide a bit, eh? :) Truthfully, I don't spend much time online anymore and I'm grateful for it. I feel like I don't always like what I become when I spend gobs of time on the internet. I'm striving to find balance there too. I'm reading a ton more and I'm really just trying to soak up every moment with my boys. I know I likely won't be home all day with them forever and so I try to just enjoy my time with them. I feel like this whole thing is hard. Its a challenge. But its also exactly where we are supposed to be and knowing that has really made all the difference. I likely won't be blogging as often but I'll try to update every week or two and post more (and far better quality) pictures and videos of the boys.
Much love to you all
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